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The Virtues of Cowardice . . .
So, here we go: I watched Alien a few years ago, and I found it kind of boring. I liked Sigourney Weaver in it, of course. Ian Holm and Tom Skeritt were good. I found some of the scenes kind of creepy,...
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“Next Time, I Get to Seduce the Rich Guy.”
I really enjoyed Mission Impossible. I was highly disappointed by Mission Impossible 2. I didn’t even bother to see Mission Impossible 3. Mission Impossible 4: Ghost Protocol? Yeah, it was actually a...
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“I Am Catwoman. Hear Me Roar.”
The Avengers was awesome. This must be said. (And then repeated. And then possibly even sung.) But The Avengers is not the only gigantic superhero movie coming to a theater near you this summer....
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“Maybe It’s Time We Stopped Trying to Outsmart the Truth, and Let It Have Its...
Finally. I thought I’d never finish this thing. I don’t think the movie’s perfect — I certainly don’t think it’s as good as The Dark Knight — but it is, ultimately, a very satisfying end to a trilogy....
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“You Know, It’s Moments Like These When I Realize What a Superhero I Am.”
Ladies and gentlemen, the return of Tony Stark . . . I haven’t completely made up my mind about a few things yet, but for the most part, I had a pretty great time watching this. SUMMARY: After the...
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“Oh, You Wouldn’t Know Them, Darling. They’re Respectable.”
Mek and I liked The Thin Man so much, we decided to watch the sequel. The second of five sequels, actually: After the Thin Man. This is a Baby Review, and be forewarned: there will be SPOILERS...
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“When You Have to Shoot, Shoot. Don’t Talk.”
Earlier this year, I watched A Fistful of Dollars and really enjoyed it. I’d hoped I would like The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly just as much. And maybe I would have . . . if it hadn’t been three hours...
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“Well Done. You’ve Just Decapitated Your Grandfather.”
I’ve been pretty much obsessed with The Avengers since I first saw it in 2012, so I knew I’d get around to seeing Thor: The Dark World at some point, despite the fact that Thor is easily my least...
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“So, It’s You and a Syringe Against the Capitol? See, This is Why No One Lets...
Hunger Games: Catching Fire came out in November. I finally saw it last weekend . . . with about forty other slackers who randomly decided to also watch the film months after it opened. Bastards. One...
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“I’m With You Till The End of The Line.”
Every year, there’s at least one movie I’m absolutely dying to see, and this year it was Captain America: The Winter Soldier. Events conspired against me — websites lying about movie times, a massive...
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10 Awful Sequel Titles
Well, we have a title for the upcoming Batman vs Superman movie, and it’s very sad indeed: Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice. Many people object to the ‘v’ in that title, arguing that ‘v’ is almost...
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“I Don’t Want Your Suffering! I Don’t Want Your Future!”
X-Men, I enjoyed. X2, I really enjoyed. X-Men: The Last Stand remains the most disappointing film I’ve ever seen in theater, ever. X-Men Origins: Wolverine was ridiculous, and yet bothers me...
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Top 10 Favorite Final Girls
Last week, a friend of mine sent me a list of someone’s favorite final girls. I eagerly clicked on the link — because lists plus horror equals yay! — only to find myself completely enraged by the...
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“There Are No Strings On Me.”
It’s 10:00 p.m. Thursday night. I’m sitting in an aisle seat at the Roxy Theater and the Marvel credits have just started to play. My little hands are clasped loosely together. I can actually feel the...
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“What A Day, What A Lovely Day!”
I knew I’d watch Mad Max: Fury Road because I’d already seen all the other Mad Max movies — and, well, Tom Hardy. Hardy won my heart in Inception (him and JGL, anyway), so I’m always excited whenever...
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“Sir, Ethan Hunt is the Living Manifestation of Destiny.”
About four years ago, my sister, my buddy, and I all went to the movie theater to see Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol. I had almost zero expectations at the time, having not been invested in the...
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“How Do We Blow It Up? There’s Always A Way To Do That.”
All right, people. After several days of frantically dodging spoilers on social media, I FINALLY saw Star Wars: The Force Awakens. The more I think about it, the more I find small flaws and nitpicks,...
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The 2015 Movie Superlatives
Okay. One week into 2016 and we finally have the last of my End of the Year posts. Welcome, friends, to the 2015 Movie Superlatives! (Feel free to imagine some loud cheering here, like you’re at a...
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“It Always Ends In A Fight.”
Well, my friends. The time has come. CIVIL WAR IS UPON US. DISCLAIMER: There will be no spoilers for Civil War until the aptly named and easily avoidable Spoiler Section. However, there will be...
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“Plan B? We Need A Plan C, D, E. We Need More Alphabet.”
The Fast and The Furious movies fascinate me. Not so much the movies themselves, necessarily, but how passionate people are about them. I watched the original film back whenever it came out, what, 15...
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